Finding Me Again

For the past thirteen months I've been working on my fitness and trying to improve my mombod. I've only lost 11 pounds so far, and I'm not to my ideal body yet, but I wanted to share my progress thus far.

Thanks to countless hours of dance during my entire childhood and a crazy high metabolism, I've always been naturally very thin. I had 6 pack abs at 7 years old, that I'd show off as party trick. I grew up on fattening casseroles and greasy fast food between dance classes, and never lost my flat stomach. 

In middle and high school I was close to dangerously thin at times, yet all I'd eat is junk. Through college my eating habits didn't change, but I was still super active as a full time student and waiting tables/bar tending full time, so I'd burn most of it off. I gained a little weight, but it looked better than teetering on the edge of underweight like I had been.

Here's a super-skinny  me trying on a new bikini I got for my 16th birthday

Here's me on my honeymoon--probably in the best shape of my life/ my ideal weight.

My first year teaching I started working out as part of my daily routine and was it pretty good shape when I got pregnant with Avery. I gained 35 lbs with my pregnancy and I totally stopped working out, and lost all but 7 pounds of it before getting pregnant again with Jonah.

5 weeks pregnant with Avery

I only gained 25 lbs with him and lost all but 2 or 3 in the first couple of months. Then my milk supply dropped and he started losing weight suddenly. I was doing everything I could to build my milk supply back up. I was taking supplements and eating every food known to help: whole milk with ovaltine, Gatorade, tons of oatmeal in the form of lactation cookies, lactation energy balls, lots of "healthy fats" of avocado and coconut oil added to every meal. None of it helped much and I threw in the towel in December 2015. What it did though, was make me overweight and miserable. I felt like a failure at breastfeeding for the 2nd time and now was the heaviest I had ever been aside from pregnancy. I had to buy all new clothes. 

I started my weight loss journey in January with all the rest of the world, and have had the slowest progress ever. All those years of eating whatever the hell I wanted had caught up with me. I meal prepped, joined a gym, and then wouldn't be able to go because my babies stayed sick for what felt like months and I got sick over and over as well. I'd go through patches of staying very motivated and would get discouraged by the stubborn scale and give up for about a month before dedicating myself again. This pattern went on all year. I slimmed down enough to feel OK in a swimsuit on vacation then I fattened back up a bit over the holidays, but luckily not quite to where I began.

Summer 2016

This January I promised myself that I'd at least reach my pre-Jonah weight by the time he's two. The past 2 months I've been the most consistent, as that 2nd birthday is sneaking up on me FAST! Jonah is now 23 months old and I have officially hit my goal weight about 2 weeks ago! I'm not quite to my pre-Avery weight and not sure it will happen anytime soon but it's my next goal!

I'm not writing this to sell you a product, but maybe it'll be motivating to someone. If nothing else it's a reminder to myself to not give up on me again!  Here's what's working for me right now.  For the past 2 months I have worked out at least 3-4 times per week and have been making way healthier choices. I still love junk food and sweets but just let myself have a few bites rather than an entire serving to myself. I don't meal prep but I do try to meal plan heathyish dinners that the whole family will like. I have really increased my daily protein amount and focus on that rather than counting calories. I take at least one shot of apple cider vinegar a day as well as probiotics. I'm sampling some other supplements as well but probably don't take them consistently enough to make that much of a difference.
I know this isn't a significant amount of weight loss when you see so many posts of people losing 50+lbs, but this is my first time to truly struggle with my weight and

for the first time in a long time, I feel great about my body. It's not perfect by any means, but looking at pictures from a year ago, I am pleased with my progress. I love seeing results from all my hard work. I am seeing muscles that I haven't seen since high school! I feel stronger and finally like I've found myself again. While I still have plenty of cellulite and stretch marks, I love my body for making the two most perfect babies and will keep taking care of it so I can take good care of them. It's amazing what our bodies can do!

Weight difference is 11lbs from the top row